Eat, Drink, and Stay Slim: 10 Things I Learned from Living in Spain

“No lo sabes?” Asked Carmen, my Spanish roomate, while we stood in our tiny kitchen in the middle of our little flat in Madrid.


No lo sabes translates to “Don’t you know that?”-- a phrase Carmen would say to me frequently over the year that I lived with her.

Carmen had decided at some point, probably before she even met me, that it was her responsibility to educate poor little ignorant American girls on the evils of the American diet and to enlighten us with the wonders of Mediterranean gastronomy.

And while she typically trended towards the dramatic, she was pretty on point with her knowledge.

Americans have a ton of mental anguish around their bodies and eating.

Spanish women, on the other hand, barely think about it.

Americans, after all, are constantly struggling with their weight and dieting like their lives depend on it, while the French, Spanish, and Italians are known for quite the opposite.

They enjoy good food and maintain la bella figura effortlessly.

I found this fascinating.

I was a sponge for Carmen’s lessons.

I had moved to Spain with the intention of learning how Spaniards enjoyed food and yet stayed slim. I was hyper aware of the evils of the American diet then and yet, despite eating a very healthy diet, was still overweight.

Carmen was the perfect guide.

And she taught how to cook and answered all of my questions.

She took me out until 5 in the morning to secret flamenco bars where we danced for hours.

On my own I would study people in cafes and restaurants to see what and how they were eating.

Here is what I learned.

1. Don’t Obsess Over Food. Spanish women are not obsessed with food, nor are they obsessed with their weight. Of course people enjoy food, but it isn’t a big deal. Eat according to tradition, not too much, and move on. No one lives for food or fetishizes it.  I remember a Spanish friend remarking that when she had visited the States she noticed all the food commercials (which in and of itself was foreign-- the Spanish had not advertised food until recent history-- thank you, globalization) where people were always smiling and very happy in those commercials. She didn’t understand the connection of food and happiness and why we would market it that way. She was genuinely baffled. And I was also baffled:  doesn’t food make everyone happy?!?! Aren’t we all obsessed with happiness and eating our way to contentment? Clearly not. Spanish, French, and Italian people enjoy good food, but they don’t have overhunger and overdesire the way we do-- and this says a lot about us versus them. We could stand to learn a lot in that department.
2. Don’t Be Afraid of Hunger. In Spain and the rest of southern Europe there are strict windows of time in which it is socially acceptable to eat. No one eats lunch, the biggest meal of the day, until 2 PM and you won’t find anyone eating past 4:00. And then dinner begins around 9:00 PM, with very few people eating any earlier than that. What happens in between? Life! La dolce vita! But no snacking, ever. Period. Not ever. No such thing. No such concept. So what happens if you don’t eat enough lunch or miss a meal on accident? You get hungry. And you deal with it. And you eat at the next meal. That’s it. No drama. No freaking out. No panicking or binging or excuse making. It’s just hunger, it will pass, you can handle it, and you will be fine. Move on.
3. Breakfast is a Non-Event. They either skip breakfast entirely or eat a piece of toast with butter, jam, or olive oil.  Breakfast can happen first thing if one is hungry, or hours after rising-- at say 10:30 or 11. Or again, not at all.Coffee is a standard and usually taken black or with full-fat milk. Yes, I said full fat.That brings me to my next point.
4. No Such Thing as Lowfat. There is no lowfat anything. Ever. Not yogurt, not milk, not nada. Why would there be? There is no obesity epidemic (or sugar industry mucking everything up, but that is a different post) and therefore people just eat the way they’ve eaten for centuries-- which is eating whole foods, intact with the fat that it comes with. They eat fat like the natural fats from jamon serrano, whole eggs, tons of olive oil, butter in cooking.
5. Eating is Social. In Spain, lunch is traditionally the main meal of the day but with the modernization of the world this meal is slowly giving way to dinner. People take time out of the day to sit down and eat a full plate of meat, fish, or eggs with vegetables, and maybe a small portion of carbohydrate such as pasta, bread, potato, or rice. People sit down and eat together, slowly and leisurely. In our modern world this tradition is slowly fading out, with people eating sandwiches in front of their computers during lunch, but it is important to note that people are also getting fatter in Spain these days, so this article focuses on traditional practices and not totally up to date ones.
6. “Nada en Paquete”. Nothing in a package, is what Carmen always used to say. She got her meat from the butcher, her fish from the fishmonger, and her fruits and vegetables from the open air market.  Culture and tradition constranis what people eat. While people will eat lots of variety in terms of protein and vegetables, they do not a ton of items outside of Spanish traditional: Spanish tortilla, meat, vegetable, bread, rice. One of the challenges of the American diet is we have so many options and not a lot of constraint to help us to make decisions. This can lead to decision-overwhelm and choice-fatigue, which can negatively impact our ultimate result.
7. Sweets are for Children. Sugar is enjoyed by adults on occasion, and in small portions such as jam on toast or a piece of good chocolate a few times each week.
8. Don’t Diet. Why would you? It is a rare thing that someone is overweight or obsese in the Mediterranean, so the concept of a diet not necessary. When one does need to drop a few pounds, I was told by a stunningly beautiful woman named Pepa, she just eats a little less bread, or maybe cuts it out all together. That’s it. Simple. Clean. No drama mama.
9. Don’t Exercise. Spanish women move for pleasure. They walk. They dance. They enjoy movement. They certainly don’t sweat buckets at the gym in an attempt to “make up” for overeating or indulging in something that tastes good.
10. Live La Dolce Vita. Mediterranean women live whole, beautiful lives. They prioritize family, friends, relaxation, creativity, the arts, intellectualism, politics, and travel-- they have time for all of this because they aren’t spending inordinate amounts of time obsessing about food.

We have a lot to learn from Mediterranean gastronomic food traditions, but the most important points are not about the actual gastronomy. Instead we could stand to examine how people think-- and don't think-- about food and how that, in turn, informs how they feel, the actions they then take, and the results they get.

I recommend you pick one thing from the list of 10 to start to implement today. Pick one that feels good to you and go for it.

No drama, mama.

Schedule a Free Mini Session